Tuesday, April 24, 2012

In which I accuse New Wave rockers "The Romantics" of defiling Rick James' Grave

Update: The below is officially facts because it is cited in Wikipedia.

In the low stakes world of accusing 80s rock bands of ripping off Rick James, few have the gumption to publicly post their assertions on the Internet.  What with the rabid fanaticism of "The Romantics" die-hards and the Internet's strict requirements for rock solid proof, no one is willing to touch this red hot topic with a serial mouse.  But people of the Internet, live in fear no more - for I shall lead you out of the dark as I raise my keyboard and shout for all to hear that The Romantics totally ripped off "Super Freak" in their modest 1983 hit "Talking in your sleep".

"What?" you say in exasperated disbelief.  "Why would a hard rocking New Wave band whose fourth album totally went to number 14, stoop so low as to jack Rick James, the paragon of demure sensibilities, the very image of 80s sobriety? Well, the dastardly "The Romantics" might as well have been twirling their riff-stealing mustaches while they tied genteel Rick to the train tracks of financial oblivion. And gentle reader I'm getting all up in there because they totes did.  Poor damsel Rick could only wait for a super hero to appear out of nowhere and save the day.  And that's what I've done.  All Rick had to do was wait 21 years and then die and then wait 8 more years and here I am with my Jones-like ability to show up just in time and save the day.

The Facts:
  • Fact: "Super Freak" was released in 1981
  • Fact: "Talking in your sleep" was released in 1983
  • Fact: Wikipedia is indisputable

The Damning Evidence:
Everyone knows the famous "Super Freak" riff.  Listen closely to seconds 2-6 or the whole thing because it repeats like a 1000 times.   Now listen to the exact same thing as perpetrated by The Romantics.  Bam!  They don't call it "Gotcha Journalism" for nothing.  Ok, no one would call this Journalism but still. Bam?

The Superfluous Conclusion:
There's not much more to say. The Romantics are evil thieves what profited from an innocent man's paean to his love of skanks.  It's time we brought these heartless bastards down and finally give a little praise to a humble man who quietly lived the bard's life, writhing and suffering for his art.

p.s. If your spell checker doesn't recognize "skanks", don't try to check your spelling by Googling it.  The results are disgusting.

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